If you checked four or more boxes, you are not in a relationship; you are in a sterile field.
A commenter replied: “Classic Virginoff vs. Nutella dynamic. Ditch him. He doesn’t want a girlfriend; he wants a hazmat suit.” Virginoff Nutella Boyfriend
: They wait for their boyfriend or partner to notice the "stain." If you checked four or more boxes, you
When you combine “Virginoff” (sterile man) with “Nutella” (sticky woman), you get the central conflict: you are not in a relationship
The most interesting linguistic choice is the inclusion of In most viral memes, the messy partner is the man (the "man-child") and the clean partner is the woman (the "nagging wife").